PLEASE COME SOON

So this weekend soo far i have done a Lot.. I went to see my friend Jarell sing at the Key club in Hollywood. He did an AMAZING job!!!! I am soo proud of him... He had a live band and background singers and everything!!! I could not STOP smiling.... After the show I went to visit this guy I am talking to In East L.A. Everything was cool and I had a nice time spending time with him... We did have sex this time.. It was the first time we had sex together. And everything was cool.. But I guess Sex just is Not for me.. I topped him and I was bored and thinking more about other things... And when he topped me i was thinking about this meeting I had to go to at 10 am the next day... (SIGH) It's not that he is not a good guy, because he is... I like his personality and everything.. He is sweet and caring and just an Overall AWESOME package... But I have been really wrestling with just this LOVE thing for weeks now.. And if it's for me or if I EVEN REALLY WANT IT... But right now i am CONVINCED that no matter who it is.. Sex is not for me.. I mean.. I just had sex and it was not the highlight of my day.. Not that it was not cool.. cuz it was.. but I wish I was into it more, that I could have that feeling of Euphoria and just pure Bliss.. But I can't.. I am not sure if it is a Mental block.. or if I just Don't enjoy sex... I am starting to see that no matter who i have sex with.. it's the same when it comes to me... I don't know what to do about it... Is there a song out there that deals with how I feel... ? If so I would REALLY love to hear it! I'm Just not a sex guy.. shoot.. I don't think i am a relationship guy... I don't know what type of guy I am... I'm almost 26 and still feeling like I am 13, meaning trying to figure out who I am. Who I am on the inside, why I feel these ways. I don't know what to do.. every time I figure something out about myself i feel like I just took two steps backwards in Life... (Sigh) I don't know who or what I am looking for.. But... can it please.. Please Come Soon..