When am I going to find someone for me... i often times wonder this question... at One point i just wanted ANYONE to be into me... now that some people have been feeling me... i HAVE LEARNED THAT I CAN NOT JUST HAVE anyone like me... BUT I HAVE TO BE ATTRACTED TO THEM ALSO. Whether it be physically or mentally the attraction has to be there.
i really wonder where the guy of my dreams is at... DOES he even exist.. am i putting too much into this dream guy of mine that i am eliminating every guy on this planet with my expectations?
When am I going to stop cheapening myself by being ok with being a secret or on the back burner with someone. Why am i ok with that now... Have i gotten to the point of being so low on the love gauge that i will take any and everything that is given to me with an accepting attitude.
The silent screams are getting louder... But what am I screaming for if i never change my environment to get what i want.
I change what i am doing to get what i want... meaning going out more and chilling with more people and a good friend of mine says she is concerned with me being a whore and me partying too much.. Shoot i did not do it when i was 20,21,22,23,24,25, and 26 so i might as well get it out of my system now. HAHA... but i can see what she has concerns about.... and i appreciate it :-)
when will i put into practice what i have learned... i am not sure.. I am getting tired.... of everything regarding love.. maybe its not out there for me.. i STILL HAVE HOPE...but sometimes its easier to just think no one is going to satisfy your love requirements.
Good Night.
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